When Katie and her husband Sergio moved to Westchester County from New York City, they decided to host their first au pair. With Sergio originally being from São Paulo, they thought matching with a Brazilian au pair would be a wonderful way to create a home environment that kept their two young children connected to the Portuguese language and Brazilian culture, while also covering their childcare needs as two working parents. Six years later, Katie and Sergio have welcomed five Brazilian au pairs and learned a lot about being host parents.
Here are some of their best tips when it comes to interviewing and welcoming an au pair into your home.
1. Set your au pair criteria
Before even beginning the interview process, Katie and Sergio set criteria they’re looking for in their au pair. “We look for Brazilians who have experience with driving”, says host mom Katie. Although they’re committed to speaking mainly English with their au pairs, Katie comments, “We’re intentional because of Sergio’s culture and language, and we prefer the kids have more exposure to Portuguese. It’s been great for au pairs to teach the kids words or nursery rhymes songs in Portuguese. And if there’s ever something too hard to explain, it’s easier to have the natural native language that Sergio can easily communicate with them.” Having specific search criteria has helped ensure au pairs they talk to already check important boxes they’re looking for.
2. Be present for the interview process
Katie and Sergio ensure they schedule au pair interviews after the kids’ bedtime so there won’t be any distractions. They also clear both their schedules to be fully present during those conversations. It’s a big decision choosing the right au pair, so they make the time and space to fully engage in conversation and give each au pair candidate the opportunity to learn about their family from both of them together.
3. Ask the right au pair interview questions
“We ask lots of questions about driving, the types of cars they’ve driven, manual vs. automatic. They’re not make-or-break, but it’s an important criteria”, says host mom Katie. Making sure they find a strong driver is important since their kids have a lot of after-school activities and driving is a big part of the au pair job for them. The family also asks questions about the au pairs themselves and their intentions about the program like, “What do you like to do for fun?”, “Where are the places you want to travel to?”, “What are your goals with program?”, and “How would you define a wonderful and successful experience?”. These help Katie and Sergio get to know the au pair’s personality and hone in on what their true purpose is for becoming an au pair.
4. Set expectations and provide resources
Katie and Sergio are very transparent with their au pairs from the get-go. They are respectful and understanding of their au pairs’ free time, and are also very clear about their expectations when it comes to their children’s care and living in their home. “Set expectations upfront,” says Katie. In addition to the rules, they also arm their au pairs with resources to be successful. “We get them a phone to make sure they have a local number. They have a credit card in their name, but it’s a family credit card. They use it for the kids, but if they’re in a jam, they can use it for emergencies. In case something happens and they’re in a bind, they can use it. We want them to feel peace of mind.” The family always provides train tickets or subway passes if they’re studying in New York City. These resources have streamlined a lot of processes for the family.
5. Be transparent and understanding with your new au pair
Transparency is extremely important to Katie and Sergio. They always offer to let their new au pair speak with their current au pair before matching. They also give a video tour of the home and offer to speak with the au pair’s parents. “We’re in a lucky spot since my husband speaks Portuguese, but even if he didn’t, we could still meet and do Google translate and wave hello”, says Katie. It’s important to them that their au pair’s family feel comfortable sending their child to live with a new family in a different country, so they do what they can do to provide them with peace of mind.
6. Set your au pair up for success
Whenever a new au pair arrives, the family usually has a shadow period. The new au pair arrives about a week prior to the current au pair’s departure and shadows them. The family also spends as much time as needed practicing driving. They set the au pair up with a phone, bank account, and direct deposit for stipend payment. During this overlap period, the current au pair can also introduce the new au pair to other au pairs in town so they can start to develop their own social network. Katie and Sergio also have a family plan at their gym and local pool and offer those memberships to their au pair too. Katie keeps a daily journal with the schedule for the day, and puts additional notes in there early on, like a list of foods the kids like. They review it in the morning so the au pair is starting their day confidently.
7. Make your au pair feel welcome
With each transition, Katie and Segio organize a welcome and goodbye dinner with their arriving and departing au pairs and family. They get the new au pair some essentials and special items like a toiletry care package, a beach bag, and a beach towel. “I ask them their favorite color and try to coordinate those things. I want them to feel welcomed and give them a fresh start.” -Host Mom Katie
Katie and Sergio recently welcomed their fifth Brazilian au pair, Laura. While they continue to learn and finesse their process through each hosting experience, we think they’re doing a fantastic job! Thanks for sharing your tips with us, Katie!
If you’re interested in welcoming an au pair into your home, apply today! Au Pair USA has been successfully matching and supporting host families for over 35 years. We look forward to helping you welcome your next au pair!
